How the System makes Losers

I had a dream when i was small, its very common to have one. Some dream of being a doctor some of being an engineer, some of being a cricketer and much more. My dream was to be a Computer Engineer. I had a great interest in computers, I used to get those intuitions that maybe i was born for this that maybe i am going to make my interest count in some way or the other. That dream was when i was in the 5th standard, computers were just bought in our schools and luckily we were the first batch to study computers in my school.

I passed almost every year with top marks in the computers from my class, and it gave more strength to me to see my dream into the making. Meanwhile my maths was weak, i used to get only around 60% marks in that subject, and like many many other students i was afraid of maths. But it didnt matter i had a firm decision to make my career in Computers. I just used to love all those languages of computers for e.g: C, C++, Java, HTML and many more. I had huge interest in learning and going more deep into those languages.

Now it was the first big milestone of my career as they say. I was in Xth, and i bet you the tension which we get after just listening that grade we get wrapped by fear right from our legs to our heart and till our brains. That fear is enough for anyone to fall down in his academic year, such is the hype of SSC. And like many others my graph in studies which was always climbing to top suddenly fell down and it went so down that i couldnt even see from where it started. The examination was in march and here i was roaming out with my newly found girlfriend at the end of december. I hadnt studied a word of one of my biggest milestones notes or books, Nothing. Some might be thinking that i didnt have classes and all, but i had classes and they were damn good, these classes could pass a person who has failed 3 times in 9th grade. But as i told you the fear of SSC just made me ignorant of studies, all my interest in studies was fading, there was nothing new i learnt or read only the things which were getting new were my girlfriends. And then came February just 3 and half weeks away from my first paper. And now i was afraid real afraid of what would happen of mine if i fail. All the relatives friends their families what will they think about me if i fail here. How could a boy of my intelligence can fail.

They came in my life like some sort of fairy, they were the whole and soul reason why i passed my Xth. My brothers helped me and taught me what i never learnt in the 8 months i spent going to classes and going to school. I was just blank about Maths, the only subjects which i knew everything about were History and ofcourse English. History was one of my favourite subjects and english is everyones favourite because there are only comprehensions in that paper. About maths, well i was just a stranger for that subject, I never really paid attention to that subject, all my attention used to go to computers. i didnt new anything about the topics in maths. Some how my brothers made me practice it they taught me, not only maths but also science. And it was a miracle when i saw my marksheet, no one still believe that i got 68 percent. And the truth i was also shocked with that result because just 3 weeks ago i didnt know anything about the topics, and today here i was with highest marks in my building friends. Its still very less but everyone are proud of what they achieve, and so i am because i just did every fucking thing in those last three weeks to learn and solve the hell out of maths. And i some how managed 95 out of 150, it was a great achievement for me, even the 87 out of 100 i got in english made less sense to me then those marks.

And now i cleared the only hurdle that stood between me and between becoming an engineer, i was happy i was living my dream. And as it went to be an engineer we have to take the Science stream after our SSC. And in that stream we have to study Physics, Chemistry, and again the same old enemy Maths. And the Maths is so difficult that i prefer doing Ph'd in Literature, Reading hell lot of books is better than solving those mentally torchering sums. I wanted to do computer engineering and here i was studying the gravity of earth, studying how hydrochloric acid reacts if mixed with O2. I wanted to study computers and here i was experimenting on a rod to form static electricity or whatever it is called. The studies in science are the toughest, If you want to do Civil engineering the system shows you how to cut a Frog. If you want to do Mechanical engineering the system shows you how to create a chemical that will protect grains from getting wasted. And slowly all my interest in computers got wasted learning so many other things which didnt relate to computers or its languages in any ways. I was the most unhappy man on earth because my dream which i dreamt of since so many years was just washed out due to this system.

My question to the government is that why do we have to learn Derivatives and Integration if we want to know the languages of Computers? Why do we have to cut a Frog if our interest is in making a plan for a construction site? Why do we have to solve maths if we want to do chemical engineering. Why doesnt our system make it easy for the students? Why isnt it creating a simple process that if a student wants to do Engineering in computers the he will learn only about computers after his Xth? Why do we have to face such mentally disturbing things such as CET to get admission in engineering? Why do we have to solve papers of Physics and Chemistry if we want Computers? Why is the first year common for every engineering student when they have different passion? Maybe this is the way the system thinks that we will progress or this is the way of progression. But the fact is that all they are doing are wasting the talents making them losers and making them go into depression and atlast they attempt suicide. And I confess not once but many times i have even thought of attempting suicide, because ther is no other way left besides that. I think its time for us to make a change in this system, make a change in the way this system works, I hope you all agree with me.